you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
