none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
