How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
please come you make the beer taste better
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Randomize
