i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize