he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize