it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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