No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
