Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
