Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
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