dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
