after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
