hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
