Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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