i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
