Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
