I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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