I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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