Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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