I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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