well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Randomize