i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
