We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Girls should come with a carfax report
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
we should paint friendship bongs
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