Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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