So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Randomize
