i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
