First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
