They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
No I am not eating basil off your cock
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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