Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize