dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
