that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Randomize