Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
