i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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