We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
