he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
