like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
