it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
why does every cop we meet know your name?
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
