i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize