Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
