why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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