she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize