I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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