I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
