Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
