If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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