Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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