it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Randomize
