its not stalking. its research.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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