just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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