too bad you live with your parents still
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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