just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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